![]() ![]() Personally funerals feel like a fucking weird thing only the Addams Family should be interested in doing.Įver since a friend of mine passed away a few months after we graduated high school, I’ve been looking to attend funerals like I’ve been looking for that chick from The Loved Ones to nail my cock to a chair if I don’t piss in under 5-10 seconds. A bunch of people who, when you look at the overwhelming majority, didn’t give a fuck about you when you were walking around show up to a funeral home to see you propped up like you’re a stuffed thing they’re gonna hang over the fireplace. I think they’re fucking stupid and a crazy fucking expense. Here’s the thing about me, I don’t fucking like funerals. For whatever reason…maybe he knew something was up like Columbo, he asked me if I went to the funeral to which I answered truthfully, “No.” It was going pretty good until towards the end when I broke it to my dad this one guy who was a friend of the family passed away during this past summer and we got to talking about that. I called my dad earlier today and he happened to be at my grandparents and we all chit chatted for a little bit. Also keep in mind my mother on the other side of the family had breast cancer like 10 years ago so I assume fucking cancer is waiting for me in the hopefully far distance future like a bully waiting to pull my panties over my head in front of the girl he wants to fingerbang underneath the bleachers. This is after being told earlier this year my grandmother on that side of that family also had cancer but it was minor enough to where I think they caught it early for chemotherapy to clear it up. Yeah this the happy fucking ending if this was a bleak 1970s New Hollywood film like Taxi Driver and we get to hang out in Travis Bickle’s comatose brain where he’s imagining himself as the anti-hero. The positive of this is the medicine will hold back the cancer until old age takes him. As long as this is the reality of medical care in America, I fucking wipe my ass with the red, white and blue.Īnyways, lucky for him whatever healthcare he’s got covers this shit and his POV isn’t turning red like N-64’s Goldeneye solely because he didn’t grow up in a fucking WASP family from Connecticut with the fucking lawn jockey on the yard just to depress the servants as they walked home everyday. I assume anywhere else it’s on the house and you don’t need to feel the overwhelming burden of financial ruin while fighting for your life. If you remember doing this with the new neighbor who had to go door to door, your childhood was awesome!įrom what I’ve been told at least, he’s been put on this $10,000 medication….well $10,000 in greedy shithole America. I’ve been informed that the cancer has spread to his back and spine and it’s more fucking serious than a very special episode of an 80s tv show where a couple of kids go into a bike shop alone and the guy from WKRP in Cincinnati starts playing with their privates like he’s searching for the right station on his stereo. He’s had prostate cancer for awhile now and it’s been as minor as something as fucking scary as cancer can be. While I’m feeling pretty fricking fantastic I get a text from my aunt about my grandfather. Seuss story, bright colors shooting their shit into my eyeballs to the point I’m fucking smiling and tap dancing like Gene Kelly with Jerry. ![]() It’s been too fucking gloomy with these Halloween decorations I’ve kept up year round and I want this mother fucker to look like a Dr. Recently I’ve been adding some color to my apartment to combat the heaviness, the heaviness man. I’m pretty sure their final sunset is coming like we always hope the final sunset for the Trump Administration is coming but hey, it take a lot more to shock people than it did in Nixon’s day. But they’re on their last leg, not like Terry Funk and The Rolling Stones who assure you for the 27th time this is the final tour while booking next summer behind your back. ![]() So I’m lucky enough to be twenty six years old and still have my grandparents walking around so far avoiding falling into that eternal six foot hole. ![]() Seriously did anybody get pinkeye from that? Shit looks like a health hazardous lawsuit so bad Vince McMahon couldn’t afford his multi-million BENGAY/steroid needle cocktails anymore. Shit’s darker than what I have to imagine the point of view was for a wrestler back in the Attitude Era when they had a take a stinkface from Rikishi. ![]()
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